This quote by Alan Gordon from an earlier thread really resonated with me, and has led me to try to understand just why my pain increases when engaging in certain activities. I know how TMS is controlled to some extent by "learned behaviours", and that most of the time now, my "learned behaviours" are out of my conscious control. I fully engage in most of life's activities. I say most, because I'm 55 now, and in truth, I have no desire to go bungee jumping or snow boarding. But I have recently painted our house from top to bottom, and try to walk for at least an hour every day, some times two or even three if I'm feeling particularly energetic. My pain generally increases with sedentary occupations, such as using a computer (I'm one finger typing on my iPad at the moment), writing, reading, drawing, using the telephone (crazy!), and actually anything which I consider to be creative, useful and interesting. I am retired, with time on my hands, and anything I try to pick up as a hobby seems to create more pain. I have neuropathic pain in most of my body, but especially in my shoulders, head and jaw. I have been trying to understand why these sedentary activities create more pain, by examining my emotions around them. I know I probably try too hard, too soon when I pick up a new hobby, and can get very excited and engrossed. Is it the excitement that's sending my pain levels up? Or is it because I try so very hard to be the best I can be at whatever I'm attempting. Am I trying too hard? I know at my time of life, I'm never going to be the next George RR Martin or Robin Hobb, or produce a Rembrandt, and my scribblings are purely for my own entertainment, but why do they cause me so much pain? I do love to create, and it does take a degree of concentration, is it the concentration which is my trigger? In my heart, I know it's ridiculous that a five mile walk creates less pain than 10 minutes of typing on my laptop, or half an hour of drawing. But the pain persists nevertheless. We are coming to the end of Summer here in the UK, and my walking will soon be curtailed by the weather, leaving me with time on my hands in the house. I'd like to be able to get back to some drawing or writing, but I can feel the fear attached to these activities just at the thought of them. And there it is - fear again. Fear of pain, fear of failure, both? I never seem to match up to my own high standards. How do I change these habits formed over a life-time? I'm sure I was never as fastidious as this when I was younger, and although I did have migraines sometimes when I'd overdone the studying, or physical exercise (which really used to excite me), I was never in constant pain. Does anyone else here have severely increased pain with activities that mean a lot to them? And what are they? How can this problem be overcome?