1. Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
    Dismiss Notice

Day 10 Afraid of not being believed

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by RozieHolland, Jan 17, 2017.

  1. RozieHolland

    RozieHolland Peer Supporter

    I just wrote a letter to a colleaque who is addicted to drugs and gambling. He also lies all the time.
    It is hard for me to work with him, because I am very angry at him, he throws away his life.
    This has to do with my 2 younger brothers who died of drugs at 21 and 24.
    Now he wants to quit his addiction, he is afraid to become very ill.
    I promised him to help wherever I can. (I am a social worker - not practicing at this moment)
    Now I am afraid that he does not want believe me, because I am a colleaque.
    And that's an issue.


    This I encounter throughout my life.

    I was discharged in my first job after 10 years of work. My boss at that time was trying to have a relation with me while he was married. I said no. Then he played a dirty game and I had to go.
    I never told the real reason because they would not believe me.

    I dared not tell my mother that my father has sexually abused me.
    She always said; I am glad your father does not do such a thing.
    When I told it anyway, hell broke loose.
    I feel that she has always known it and that's why she was so firmly in its judgment.

    Is this why I kept my mouth: afraid of not being believed?
    Or I kept my mouth for not hurting my father?
    Maybe both?

    With love, Rozie.
    ringette18 likes this.
  2. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Rozie. You can lead a colleague to water, but he may not want to drink. Let him deal with his own problems and don't let his lack of faith in TMS bother you. Some people we just have to give up on and know we did our best to help them.

    You have had problems with men... your father abusing you, and your boss wanting you despite him being married, and you resist so he fires you. What an a-hole he is!

    Shakespeare said it right: "To thine own self be true."

    You need to build confidence in men (we are not all perverts). Are there any men you admire, among family and friends?
  3. RozieHolland

    RozieHolland Peer Supporter

    O Walt, I had problems with men, but not the way you think. I don't think that all men are perverts. (some are) I love men. I trust men.
    The biggest problem I had was with myself, I couldn't take a stance or attitude against men. That's different. I love(d) men, but I was very shy. (now I am open)

    What I tried to say is that true all my life I had the feeling that no one believed me.
    That is the reason; that I am afraid to help my colleaque, that I didn't do anything to keep my job, that I didn't tell my mother, that I can't start my practice again.

  4. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Rozie. Thanks for the reply. I understand better now.

Share This Page