I know exactly what I have been avoiding but I won't be able to do it much longer. I am adopted at birth, and I've known my birthmother for almost 20 years. I found her when I was in my mid-20s. My TMS pain first came on last summer when I was visiting her, and hit full force after my honeymoon after I had been worried/stressing about not inviting her to my wedding. I've always had a cordial but a bit superficial relationship with her - I am not sure I have ever cried or expressed my anger at her for giving me away. Even though I had a great life and wouldn't trade my adopted parents and their love for anything, I know those emotions are deep and I've avoided them. I am going to Boston next week for work and I am going to spend the weekend with her, alone for the most part - and I know I have to say something. I am definitely nervous. She is a walking advertisement for TMS; she has really bad back pain and had surgery for it in her 30s. She accommodates everyone else before her, to the point where the other family members even call it out to me because they find it almost annoying. My husband calls it smothering. My big fear is that she will poopoo the diagnosis and that will make me doubt it. I will have to stay strong and just get it out and not care if she believes it or not.