Day 10 Renewed hope!

I admit that I've had some serious doubts about recovering completely from my CFS/Fibromyalgia. It's easy to feel like it's going to go on forever. However, I'm coming to a point of learning to accept and embrace my current circumstances, without giving up hope of recovery or just giving in completely. I'm just accepting that it may take longer than I think, and it may not be a straightforward, linear journey upwards.

One exercise that helped me was to create a life plan/goals for myself if I continue to have the CFS/Fibromyalgia, so I have a sense of purpose and direction. Then I also wrote out a life plan/goals for myself to do when I get better. I just realised that I don't know when I will completely recover, and stressing about recovery might actually make it worse - as trying too hard could make me anxious. I also don't want to put all my life on hold until I get 100% better.

I'm coming to a point where I'm accepting my circumstances, but also thinking about the little things I can do each day that will improve my condition - for instance doing the TMS Wiki, regular relaxation exercises, eating a healthy diet, pacing myself with regular rests, and doing some exercise. I've also been considering ways I can respond when I get caught in depression and anxiety, or have a relapse of severe fatigue.

I watched one of the TED talks about pain today which gave me renewed hope of recovery, and helped me to keep going on the TMS recovery journey… as it reminded me that pain is all created in the brain, and we can shift our perceptions of pain in remarkable ways. Watching videos like this are so important to keep hope alive for me!

I hide my emotions from quite a few people, but especially my housemate (the one I often talk to). I've just been avoiding her the last couple of days as I've felt quite tired and depressed, but tonight I'm starting to feel a bit better. I just find it hard to be real with her as I feel like I don't want to be a burden. When I'm feeling depressed I tend to just keep to myself and talk to my online friends - especially those who suffer from depression and understand what I'm going through.

 

Hi, Laudisco.

I wouldn't put my life on hold until I recover. I would just keep going with TMS discovery and techniques for healing. Try to live your normal life as much as possible and think positive. Don't put a timetable on recovery. It will come when it comes. Maybe just talk about pleasant things with your housemate and share honest thoughts with your online friends. Soon you will be telling your housemate how TMS healed you and made you healthy and happy again.
Depression sucks. Laugh it away. I watched some Benny Hill videos on Youtube last night and laughed a lot. He was a very funny British tv comic.

 

Hi Laudisco,

I am in the same boat as you are, having CFS/FM with quite a lot of horrible TMS symptoms making daily life very hard sometimes.
As you, I try not to put my life on hold and start living my life now, and that makes me feel a lot better than waiting to do stuff until I am 100% better. That's also a huge stumbling block towards recovery, creating inner tension and frustration.
We indeed do not know when we will recover, but I believe that what whatever we believe in, will come to us. I am starting to see this as a spiritual journey, in which our symptoms gives us a message to take more care of ourselves and that our body is not our enemy, even if we are stuck to the couch for three weeks in a row with huge fatigue.. I see this as one big journey which will lead me to a better future, where I am completely at peace with myself, body and mind and this kind of thinking takes off the negative thoughts or emotions that I sometimes feel inside my body.
You are doing the best you can. Enjoy the ride!