Question on journaling

I find as I'm feeling better, even pain free a lot of days, that I just don't have as much desire to journal. Sometimes I just don't feel like it other times I do feel kind of an aversion which makes me wonder if there's something else I'm repressing OR if it's that I'm working this all too hard.

Thoughts?

 

Well.....

I know I "crashed" from all the writing and the exercises. I did the program on the wiki and followed it right away with Dr. Schubiner's program. After 5 weeks of writing - I was burnt out.

I continued to "free write" though in my journal and do so every morning. It's kind of a nice way to start the day. You can write about any new issues you have, anything you want. But I think staying in the habit is a really good idea. I also found that when I took my break (through my morning writing in my journal) that I'd left out some pretty huge issues from my young adulthood. I can't believe I left these out as they were rather huge things that happened. I don't think I would have remembered them without the break in the programs, or my morning writing.

My routine is to get up very early, meditate outside for a bit, and then write before I do anything else. I used to get on my computer or head for the beach first thing, but this new habit of writing has been really helpful and helps me to stay in touch with me.

I'm so stoked for you Veronica that you've done the program and felt great so quickly. But you might want to keep some of the writing going. Who knows? Maybe you are suppressing some old issues that may come up later along with the dreaded headaches. I'd keep writing. There is always something more we can learn from ourselves by simply staying in the habit of writing in a journal everyday.

BG

 

Veronica, I don't write as much as I did when I was bedridden in pain or even shortly after. But I do find that when something is going on in my life, I still like to write it down and let my feelings spew or talk it out loud. I really do feel better afterward and sometimes even have a changed perspective.

It isn't something I do every day, but I do write often. There is no rule on this; write when you feel like it--though sometimes it does take effort to make it happen! It is worth it to me!

Best wishes,

Lori

PS I like your inushuk avatar!

 

Thanks, Lori and Beach Girl.

I seem to do best with free writing lists of what I'm feeling and what might be going on. I think I'm going to keep at it in my own way--I found I was pressuring myself to do it every day, at a certain time, etc. (TMS perfectionist anyone ?)

Lori, I'm glad you knew what it was. This was from a photo I took a Walden Pond, a very peaceful place.

 

Do whatever works, but I don't think that writing at a certain time each day is being a perfectionist. It's working at making sure you stay in touch with yourself. And writing is a great way to do that. (And we know this)

Of course you need to do what works for you - without a doubt. If you're the type that can pick up a pen or start typing your feelings, then do as you want. If you take a bit to "get in there" - I would still consider writing. I guess I love what I'm getting in my morning writing. Things I had no idea were lurking come out when I least expect it and then I can work with that during the day.

Again: so happy for you Veronica that you have worked through all this and are mostly pain free now!

BG

 

i dont think its something else you're repressing you're probably just relieved that you're experiencing pain free days and you're sick of journaling. im in that same boat sometimes you just get tired of treating the problem and want to live your life. i wouldn't put pressure on yourself to journal just for the hell of it. you should want to journal to get feelings out not because you think you have to to treat the problem. that would be exhibiting perfectionist behavior which we all know where that stems from. i would keep journaling on a regular basis just to keep yourself open but dont put on pressure if you dont feel like you want to some days because i dont either

 

I agree with Beach Girl - do what works for you. What I found about myself and others going through this process is that everyone is different. And as my yoga teacher told me, you are different day to day, moment to moment. So what works for others may not work for you. And what works for you one day, may not be the right thing the next day. I also think it is about getting in tune with that inner self or voice and seeing what you need.

At the beginning I made a daily practice to work through the program. After a few weeks of discovery and gaining knowledge and tools to use, I started to evaluate what I needed that day - and I still do. Whether it be writing, meditation, quiet time, exercise, being with people, doing something for others, or doing nothing - and this in my opinion is also essential to healing. There is no predetermined path. Let it unfold with what is right for you at the right time.

 

Sewmuch: this is very cool. A great set of tools in which to approach this. I hadn't thought of this, but it's really helpful and tells your body and your mind that YOU are in control. I wish my life were set up where I could do it. But every week gets packed with appointments and things I need to take care of. So I'm trying to get better while doing lots of tasks. Some days I simply want to watch movies with cowboys in them. And some days I'm ready to take on the world. I wish I had the choice but I don't.

I believe that structuring your day around your health is key. I've tried, but still seem to have pain. I think I feel guilty when I take a day for me. That has got to go as days just for me are essential.

Thanks for posting this. I think it should be in neon above the forum title!

BG

 

After finishing the SP I noticed that my unconscious mind had actually moved out into my waking consciousness, like my center of attention had moved from the source of the pain pathways to an area of my brain where I had more rational control and understanding of those impulses. Since then I've been dealing with things like anxiety and remembering dreams with a lot of psychic content and symbolism. Don't want to write about it so much as work with it. Really an amazingly fertile period without any writing. Now, I feel I've moved through that particular time frame and am ready to tackle Schubiner's program next. It just seems like you have to do what you need to do when you need to do it rather than feeling that you must journal everyday about painful emotions repressed into your unconscious mind. There's plenty of time for that! That "laziness" you speak about may be just that sort of relaxed state the journaling is designed to access. Go with the flow - whatever feels intuitively right.

 

I agree, follow your intuition. When it speaks to you so clearly it's time to listen. Maybe your mind is calm now or on a way to finding something that will most benefit you. I view journaling as intended to get us in touch with our authentic selves: our emotions, feelings, memories, bodies. To teach us experience and interpret our world for ourselves, not by blindly following experts and other forms of conditioning. I think I'm at a stage where the next step is to deepen the trust in my own instincts and judgments. I notice that when I feel confident and positively stimulated by what I do and what happens my symptoms recede. After all, neuroplasticity that can rewire our brains into health requires constant learning, not pushing through uninspiring activities.

 

Ollin, it sounds like you're well on the way toward developing what Peter A. Levine calls the "felt sense" in his book on healing trauma, Waking the Tiger (1997). Similar to what Norman O. Browne called 'Love's Body' or the visionary poet William Blake called, 'The Human Form Divine'.

 

Ha! 'The Human Form Divine' sounds good . I'm going through Peter A. Levine's 'Healing Trauma'. I like it because what he recommends is so natural when you think about it. Trouble with humans is that we don't often think how our bodies (and minds for that matter) have evolved with innate capacities for self-balancing, we put too much trust in the products of our intellect and don't listen to the feedback from the body.

 

I think Levine's point is that our intellect gets in the way our body's innate capacity for healing. Sounds like that's what Sarno means by the title of his latest book, The Divided Mind. A neuroscientist might say the neocortex is not yet sufficiently developed to deal with powerful emotions buried deep in the paleomammalian mind (but I'm no neuroscientist!).