Hi everyone, I am new here. I have kind of stumbled upon TMS by mistake but I feel like it describes what I have. I have wandering pain that comes and goes. I also have a feeling of tightness or tension in my body that never goes away even when I feel relaxed. I have tried yoga, massage and a variety of relaxation techniques. They either do not work or only give relief for a short time. I recently picked up the book The Pain Deception. I thought that it would be all about visualizing good health and techniques like that. I was surprised to find that the key was about not suppressing anger and negative emotions. The self help books I have read focused a lot on keeping happy and positive all the time. I think that all this time I thought I was helping myself be happier and more relaxed what I was really doing was burying my negative emotions to the point where I was not aware of them. Because if I was really becoming more happy and relaxed this always on tension in my body would go away. I am feeling really upset as write this. I suppose that is a good thing. Because normally I do not allow myself to get this upset. I actually have a long history of repressing my emotions. I was moody as a child. I had a lot to be upset about, but that is a story for another time. My mom did not react well to my moods. My mom pressured me heavily to always smile and be cheerful no matter what. She once took away my music player, my most prized possession at the time, because I had a very sad expression in response to one of the songs. I got the player back later that day, on the condition that I did not listen to any more sad songs. So not only was I pressured to pretend to be happy all the time, but I could be punished for not doing it. I have a few other symptoms that may be related as well. The big one is fatigue which comes and goes. Since I have followed the advice in the book to not let your symptoms keep you from doing things, the fatigue has gotten better. I have not finished the book yet, but have skimmed it and read the chapter at the end about what you must do to heal.