FACING FEARS

I have plantar fasciitis related TMS. This is not my first time using Sarno's theories to heal myself. I have great success in the past and know I will again. For some reason, this time around, even though I know my pain is psychologically based, I still have a fear of wearing certain shoes...as if this or that shoe is less or more painful to wear. It is a fear I not yet been able to banish...despite my intellectual acceptance and faith of the TMS diagnosis. The last two days have been relatively good on the pain scale. I was wearing a pair of sandals that have extra arch support. Its getting cold, I need to start wearing closed shoes again, but I am afraid to put on my boots or sneakers for fear of the pain intensifying without the arch support I get from my sandals. Stupid I know, given the fact that I intellectually understanding that my pain has 0% to do with what shoes I wear. So yesterday I had a choice. At the end of the work day I could have gone to the gym, wearing my sandals, and rode on a stationary bike to avoid being on my feet and putting on my sneakers or I could have taken a 2 mile, brisk walk on a local rail trail. I opted for the 2nd choice as it was the choice I felt afraid of. I was so glad i did it. I wore my sneakers, I walked 2 miles in the gorgeous fall air, complete with beautiful foliage and sunshine...and my feet were no worse off...and I had promised myself that even if my feet started to hurt after (or during) the walk that I was going to pay it no mind...b/c again the pain has nothing to do with how I exercise or what I have on my feet. I will not measure my success by how much pain I have or don't have on a given day (or during a given activity). I will only measure my success by how much I don't care. I will not give my pain the attention my unconscious wants it to.

 

"I will not measure my success by how much pain I have or don't have on a given day (or during a given activity). I will only measure my success by how much I don't care. I will not give my pain the attention my unconscious wants it to."

Thank you for posting this, Lala. So inspirational that I wrote this on a sticky note to use as a mantra.

 

Well done Lala, I was so pleased to hear you chose the hardest option and had success. These small victories all contribute to not being so afraid and eventually banishing TMS. For me being afraid and continuing to exercise through the pain helped me a lot. Once you realise the pain is not damaging anything in your body the fear gradually recedes.

 

Thanks, it is so hard....getting over my fear of wearing this shoe or that shoe or fear of exercising...and the crazy thing is I did this 10 years ago...i went through the whole tms healing process and healed my foot and hand pain after almost 3 years of pain...and still i find myself doubting the process on some level...my fear must really be ingrained....I'm hoping to work it out once and for all.

 

Hi Lala. Glad to hear! Each victory (large or small!) is a step in the right direction!

 

Thanks Lala, that was very helpful. Not monitoring my pain is so hard for me, as well as not obsessing about what physical thing or behavior causes pain or lack of it. Making how much I don't care is the yardstick I am trying to use too.