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Day 25 Do I have to think depressing thoughts?

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by cookieheals, Apr 15, 2021.

  1. cookieheals

    cookieheals Well known member

    Hey all,

    I sent the same question to a TMS doctor and wanted to hear your thoughts.

    When people feel pain in their bodies, one of the recommendations in the Structured education program is to ask myself questions like 'What is bothering me' or 'What is making me upset'?

    I'm finding that asking myself these kinds of questions all day is frankly depressing as I'm focused on everything gone wrong in life and it's making me feel worse.

    Do I have to depress myself with questions like this?

    I've heard some people remind themselves TMS principles, I started using Alan Gordon's principles of asking myself "What do I feel?" and then not going into "what's making me feel this way?" but rather, "what does this feeling feel like in my body?" and giving myself lots of hugs a day reminding myself that I am safe. Sometimes I ask myself, "what's making me feel this way?" but I don't like to dwell for above reasons.

    Does this also work? Or do I "have" to depress myself all day?

    Best,
    Grace
     
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  2. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Grace,

    If you're getting depressed by the inquiry, then look for Inner Critic activity here. Are you judging yourself for what you're seeing? If so, defend your right to a normal human experience. (And if Inner Critic activity is up, there is more evidence of psychological tension you can connect with symptoms.)

    This kind of inquiry can be limited to a few minutes a day. You do not need to dwell in this.

    Also, it is important to ask, as Dr. Sarno suggested, "what might my Inner Child feel about _____(experience, self-relationship, outer interactions)" So that rather than staying at "what's going wrong here?" you go right to the impacts (possible impacts) on more hidden parts of yourself. Do this without judgement also, if you can.

    My advice here goes very well with your practice here, which I think is great. It goes to the feeling level.

    "what does this feeling feel like in my body?" and giving myself lots of hugs a day reminding myself that I am safe. Sometimes I ask myself, "what's making me feel this way?"

    Your practice to feel safe and be with yourself is very good here.

    Also, when you notice symptoms, "thinking psychologically" can be very wrote, something like this: "My foot pain is probably because part of me is really angry about XYorZ and it is hard for my personality to allow this consciously. I get it." Here I am using a random psychological insight. You would simply fill in something in your personal noticings/patterns.
     
    Last edited: Apr 15, 2021
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  3. cookieheals

    cookieheals Well known member

    Thanks for this, Andy. Appreciate you
     
  4. Balsa11

    Balsa11 Well known member

    It's about being honest with yourself about how you feel, both good and bad.
     
  5. cookieheals

    cookieheals Well known member

    Oh, the good too? Didn't know that.
     
  6. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Enjoy the good!!! Too many times we look past this as TMS'rs, trying to root out a problem. Much healing can be had by noticing and extending, tasting the neutral and the good flavors in life!!!
     

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