OK, my main egoic defence is intellectualisation. I am also very detached from my "felt sense of self" and feelings. I imagine that in order for journaling to be effective, to unrepress emotions and to be cathartic, you actually need to feel your feelings as you write. I know that if I write about one of my past traumas, I will be writing intellectually. I already know how I felt about what happened, but I won't be able to feel it as I write. It will feel like a factual account (including I felt X and Y), but not something my "inner child" might write. I can't connect with my inner child. I have talked to my counsellor about some of these events already and I don't get upset when I talk about them. It's more like I'm giving a statement, even though I recognise the precise horrible feelings these things caused, I'm not feeling them when I talk about them. I have read the page on journaling tips. Does anyone else have any advice on this for my specific situation? Would it be helpful to do something else first to help me better feel my feelings? Many thanks if you have any ideas.